Life, Love and Other Mysteries

Carrying Me Through For One More Week

2008-01-30T19:25:00.001-08:00

The whole Bartel gang together again - always tops anything and everything.
Stepping off the plane in Orlando and actually being able to breathe normally and keep my eyes open for more than 5 seconds straight... ahhhhh... the sunshine, a warm breeze and green grass will be welcomed with opened arms.
The way they've absolutely perfected the manicured lawns and shrubbery in Disney. Hmmmm... on that note, the smell of fresh cut grass... every day.
Pirates of the Caribbean
The goooooooodddd fooooooooooddd!!!
Watching Mikayla's face when she spots Snow White or Cinderella - the real deal - for the first time in The Magic Kingdom.... talk about magic. Just another thing we have in common.
My Dad in all his craziness and insanity while on vacation.
Fireworks and light shows above the castle - I'm not gonna lie to you, I've always had this thing for Cinderella's castle and don't think that just because I'm 26, going on 27, that this has even remotely changed.
Flip flops.
The Rainforest Cafe.
Waking up in the morning to bright sunny weather and the promise of another sweet day.
Good company.
Laughing with my brothers again...and again...and again...
Snapping some sweet shots with my Nikon and feeling fundamentally satisfied with the results.
"Everybody got your card????" (to be said all high-pitched and nasally) Okay, maybe not so much.
Salt water taffy.
No cell phones. No emailing. No busyness. No work. Just hanging out together and letting it all go.
Main Street in the Magic Kingdom - love it, love it, love it.
Witnessing Kar's attempt to get as many autographs as humanly possible from all of the Disney characters in sight...whatever the cost.
The villa, which we have yet to see, but we know it will be well, well worth the wait.
"i-MA-gi-NA-tion" sung by Figmint, of course.
The many, many countries of Epcot. I always like France the best.
Lounging by the pool with Josh in his new swimmin' trunks.
Downtown Disney at night.
Being able to share this passion I have for Disney with Warren - he's gonna lose his mind.

Let the Good Times Roll!!*

Silly Munchkins

2008-01-01T08:54:00.001-08:00

I couldn't resist.

Looking Back at a Good Time Indeed

2007-12-31T11:37:00.000-08:00

Christmas is, as we know it, wrapping up for another season. Was it a good one? Yup. It was just what I needed. I sit here, on New Year's Eve (day) and can look back at what I would say was a refreshing and fun time of blessing with our family - both the Toews' and the Bartel's. I always say it, but what might seem to some as an obsession with my family, only continues to grow each time I make the trek home to spend time with them. Maybe it's because I don't have the luxury of hopping into my car to see them whenever I want. Well, regardless, I am in love with this little grouping of people that God has blessed me with. They are my everything.

The Toews Brothers - Devin, Warren & Brad - Bundled up for an afternoon of chores.

Devin & Laura - Opening gifts.

Brad & Angel

Brookie & Daddy - We got together with Dave & Mel and the munchkins to celebrate Christmas, as well as Dave's birthday, a few days before we flew home. They didn't come home with us this year because they went out to B.C. to be with Dave's family. They were definitely missed by everyone. It was great... just not the same.

Mikayla & Uncle Warren - dirty faces.

Baby Josh - his first Christmas!

Yummy crepes on Christmas morning - a Bartel family tradition.
Dad is the official crepe maker. So good.

"The Blob" - A homemade Christmas tree ornament Jon made when he was little. I think it's actually supposed to be Rudolph. Everyone knows about The Blob and everyone specifically looks for The Blob when we first see the tree each year. So here it is, in all its glory.
Ah, traditions.

Mom & Dad

All of the boys got "Planet Earth" - an amazing nature documentry DVD. (You should see it!) It was kind of funny how it all happend, though. We had originally bought it, among other stuff, for my parents. When they opened it, they acted super pumped and were asking all sorts of questions about it. Then, my mom promptly stated that she had a great gift for the guys to all open. So, when they all tore apart the wrapping paper, each guy got the exact same DVD. It was pretty funny. Maybe one of those "you kinda had to be there" moments, but hilarious nonetheless.

For Christmas, my parents gave us a trip to Disneyworld!!! All of us. Yeow! They always said that once Jon & Karen got married,, we'd all go. Welp, Jon & Kar tied the knot in September, so here we go! So exciting, so exciting! The Bartel family kinda has a thing with Disney. We've gone there several times before and it's kind of our thing. So, in February, Mom & Dad, Dave & Mel and the kids, Warren & I, Steve & Vicki and Jon & Kar are headed to Orlando Florida to stay in Disney for a week!!! Can't wait.

Jon & Kar

And so, I'm sad to see the Christmas season go, but I am looking ahead to a whole spankin' new year. A clean slate. A fresh page. What will it look like? What will take place? And I'm thankful for its freshness. Cheers to the wonder of new opportunities, the excitement of new challenges and the beauty of God's love. Happy New Year.*

This, That and the Other Thing

2007-12-18T08:44:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was special. It marked two years since I married the love of my life. Warren and I have had quite the ride in the two years that we've been married so far. Some things have been overwhelming. There's been loss and sadness. There have been many challenges and bumps along the way. But there have been many joys and reasons to celebrate too. The good has absolutely outweighed the bad.

When I look at my life in a hypathetical state without him, it would seem empty and would lack so much. I have found a best friend in him. We're a team and we're one. We're in this together and I thank God for finding me a soul mate. I am blessed. Beyond words, actually.

And so, to celebrate, we went out for supper and a movie. Which brings me to the next point of this post - August Rush. Oh my GOODNESS!!! It was such a good movie - at the risk of sounding over dramatic, I will boldly say that it was truly one of the best movies I've seen. Warren had to agree (and ladies, that's saying something!). It was just so inspirational and well written. I would highly recommend it. It was that good.

Lastly, we are heading home for the holidays and I am (as always) bursting at the seams with excitement and anticipation. So, I had to stick in a little glimpse of a Bartel Christmas for the record.

I feel giddy when I think about: sitting by the fire with a cappuccino, visiting with my parents, eating a home cooked meal (mom's cooking is always the best), going to church on Christmas Eve, watching Monsters Inc for the 50th time with Dad, visiting the shop (the infamous Bartel Machine) and taking in that 'shop smell', unwrapping gifts with everyone - such a multitude of paper and bows and I love it, Mom's sugar cookies with mile-high icing, seeing Kodak again... and the list is unending. Should be good.*

White Lily

2007-12-07T09:07:00.001-08:00

A time of suffering to God isn't hopeless. It's an opportunity for growth and it's the road to a closer relationship with Him. That's the idea anyway. But we don't usually see that right away. Our capacity of seeing beyond the here and now is often shadowed by the sorrow and the loss we feel. It's very real and very now and that's okay. We need to feel everything. We need to move through all the phases at the right time.

But there's something beautiful about the way God reasons with us, each of us on such a personal level and in such a way that only we can understand and make sense of. He knows what we need and how we need to hear it. He understands how we're wired and what will bring us comfort during a time where the tears flow freely and the hole in your heart only grows.

It was with an extremely heavy heart that I shuffled into our kitchen in the morning a few weeks ago, tear-stained eyes, shaky limbs, pounding head. I was hanging by a thread and felt things I just didn't know how to deal with, how to make sense of. As I entered the room, I lifted my head and scanned my surroundings. As I gazed out our back patio doors, the corner of my eye caught something that left me breathless. I looked down at the plant sitting at my feet and noticed a large white lily standing tall and in full bloom high above its leafy canopy below. The sun poured through our windows and there was a very obvious ray of light spotlighting this wonder, specifically lighting up the flower. Incredible. We've had this plant for a year and a half and there has never been any trace of a flower on it, I didn't even know that this was a flowering plant. Actually, just the night before, I had watered it and there certainly was no flower or even buds in sight. God knew. He knew. He knew that more than any sympathetic word, any hug or any perfectly written note, a visual picture of life, of beauty and of love was what I needed.

I cherish the idea of God as a Father. I envision a man with a soft expression of his face, kind eyes and gentle hands, scooping me up in his arms and holding me tightly. The comfort that I feel from that illustration is unexplainable. Maybe it's because of the relationship I've always had with my own Dad. Maybe it's because of the simplicity of God's love. It's not complicated. It's right in front of us.

As my white lily continues to stretch upwards, I am trying to do the same. I'm growing and I'm trusting. I believe in the promises of my God.*

A Sugar Palace for the Munchkins

2007-12-06T13:25:00.000-08:00

I suppose I should start with a very exciting, yet painfully obvious fact - the Christmas Season is in full swing - how could I not make special mention of my absolute favorite time of year?

Ah yes, every mall is a heinous circus production, every Starbucks is lined up with holiday consumers, needing their cinnamon latte fix and most every home in Saskatoon glistens with sparkling twinkle lights and cedar roping around the front door. Weren't we just here?

And though Christmas faithfully brings out a certain nostalgic feeling in me from year to year, I owe it all to my love for family tradition and the warmth that hugs my heart each holiday season.

So, let old traditions continue and new ones begin. This past week has been no exception. It started off with a very fun and entertaining afternoon with the munchkins. We attempted our first (of many to come) gingerbread houses. Let me just gush for a minute about my ever-favorite role as an auntie. I could go on for hours. For every very precisely placed gumdrop stuck on the white icing-lined rooftop by one girl, there was an equally enthusiastically placed jube-jube in the mouth of the other. I'll leave the assumptions as to who did what with you. *grin* A terribly priceless afternoon.*

I stand, I stand in awe of You...

2007-11-15T19:31:00.001-08:00

May the incredible love of JESUS knock your socks off!

"The Lord is my Shepherd, I have everything I need."
Psalm 23:1 NIV

Hey There, Little Fella!

2007-10-26T07:38:00.000-07:00

Baby Joshua David Berg - weighing 8lbs. 8oz. - Thursday, October 25, 2007

He's pretty neat, hey guys?

Mikayla's such a big sister - she was holding him so carefully and just LOVED him.

Brookie was excited too...a little unsure...but she studied him like crazy. Who IS this guy??

Oma, of a grandSON for the first time!

Kayla wanted to be right by him all the time - she'll be a big help for her mom, I'm sure.

SUCH a good day!! I am overwhelmed. So much emotion for this new life that God's brought into the world. Ten fingers and ten toes. Who woulda thought you could be filled with so much love for someone you just met? I am so thankful for God's grace and love. A healthy baby is one of God's greatest gifts. I couldn't a be happier auntie.
More to come soon...for now, I wanna go snuggle him.*

Because of my Sketchbook

2007-10-23T11:24:00.000-07:00

I am artistic. That's how God made me and that's my passion. Lately, I’ve been frustrated with the lack of opportunity to use my gift, in that I work full time in a job that isn’t pulling from this skill set whatsoever. I feel like it’s such a waste.

Mine & Warren’s life (like most people) is so busy. I realized the other day that I missed being creative. I hadn’t used my gift in a really long time. It left me feeling empty and anxious.

So, I went out, bought myself a new sketchbook, came home, put on some Sandy Patty (don’t pretend like you don’t know who she is), sang praise & worship music (along with Sandy) and sketched…..for 3 hours!!! I can’t explain how that felt. I can’t explain the closeness I felt with God. It was great. That’s how I spend time with God. That’s how I can visit with Him and feel closest to Him.

I have always found it tough to ‘do devotions’ because I don’t like to read very much and I don’t get as much out of books….it feels like school to me (and we all know how much I liked school). But when I can be in my own world, sketching, creating, designing, I’m quiet and can listen. I can connect.

I was encouraged and reminded of the fact that everyone communicates with God differently. God is always speaking to us, but in such different ways from each other. I felt so at peace because I was doing what God created me to do...and using it to be with Him.*

The Big "2-7"

2007-09-26T15:23:00.000-07:00

Uncle Warren turned 27 on Saturday, September 22...and was the cake ever good!*

At Last...

2007-09-14T11:07:00.000-07:00

A long-awaited update. I'm still waiting for a disc with pics of the wedding to come from home, but I've got a couple gooders for now. Check me on facebook. I'll stick 'em on there once they're here.

September 1st was essentially one of my favorite days up-to-date and I'll tell you why. Inspiration. I can only think of a few other select dates in my adult life that had such a profound impact on my heart and on my soul. Call me cheesey, call me whatever the heck you want but in all honesty, God touched my being on that day. He did. I felt so much pride for Jon & Kar and I was bursting at the seams beacsue of it. The wedding was a beautiful portrait of who they are as individuals and who they are as a team. Together, they've been through so much - basically growing up - and this day was a long time coming. It was perfection.

The wedding itself had everything. Sentiment, tons of laughter and a whole lot of music. Highlights were: When Jon saw Karen for the first time, coming over the bridge with her dad - his expression made me weep... Hailey (Karen's childhood dog) walking down the isle with a bow around her neck as a part of the wedding party (entitled Member of the Founk Family in the program).... When Jon twirled Kar around on the dance floor as they were introduced before the reception began....Pina Coladas!....The speeches were all awesome. They were so touching and full of memories.... Vicki's video production - Holy Smokes! It was fantastic!!.... The dance.... When Jon got up with his guitar and sang for Kar - it was beautiful....the energy and the joy that was evident throughout the whole day - in the guests, the family and most importantly, the couple. Everyone had a GOOD time.

It's an interesting thing. The fact that I look up to my little brother so much and the roots he's firmly planted in his faith, his work ethic and his dreams. Here I sit at 26 years old, going on 27, and I look to him for inspiration and advice. It's special. I just can't really explain it. I'm just so proud. So proud. It's exciting to watch him grow and to watch him now take on the role of a husband to Kar. It's a whole new level and it's a blessing to witness.

And now our family's complete. I'm thrilled to be able to finally call Karen my sister after all these years. There is something special about these two and I'm excited to see what their bright and shiny future will look like.*

The Beauty of it All

2007-09-06T11:49:00.000-07:00

*sigh!* Well....the day came and the day went. It was perfect. What a wedding! What a couple!!! I was completely inspired after the day and as I crawled into bed at 2:00am after the wedding, I thanked God for my little bro and his new wife. I love them both. Lots. I don't know that I have ever felt so proud of who they are as individuals and as a couple.

What a blessing.

I will definitely post more, along with pics, once we get them. In the meantime, I will continue to be the proud sister that I am, excited to see what God's gonna do in their life together.*

I'm A-Comin'

2007-08-17T11:02:00.000-07:00

Friday afternoon. 12:02pm. I find myself ancy with anticipation for another summer weekend. Wouldn't you know it, my favorite season is wrapping up. Blech. I don't know about you guys but to me, the air feels 'fallish' already, especially in the mornings, as I walk up to the clubhouse. The evenings are getting shorter too. Sad. Bummer. I dread what's coming. But you know what? It's been good. Summer kicks. Love it. I can't tell you how many ice cream cones I've downed within these past few months. Too many to count. Well worth it.

So, though I'm sad to see my summer fade, I'm bursting at the seams with excitement for what's to come. This year for me, end of summer means I get to go home to see my little bro get hitched. September 1st, 2007, marks the very anticipated wedding of Jon & Karen. Something I've looked forward to for months now. And yes, it'll be a party. No doubt about it.

That being said, I get to spend the week before at home, in Leamington, with the whole fam. Mom & Dad, Dave & Mel and the chicklets, Steve & Vicki and Jon & Kar. Oh, and Kodak. Knowing this puts a smirk on my face and my heart beats a little faster. Ahhh! So excited, so excited.

I have no idea how I'll make it through this last week of work before my holidays...*

Silly Girls

2007-08-03T09:52:00.000-07:00

I sure do miss my girls. Come home soon!

All of a Sudden

2007-07-29T10:43:00.000-07:00

We hit a deer last night. BAM! Just like that, our car was wrecked, our hearts were pounding and we were once again reminded of how fast and how unexpectedly life can change. Man. The situation could have looked a whole lot different.

After we called the cops to come put down the deer and continued on our way home, I was shaking like a leaf in my passenger seat, tears in my eyes. As I looked out the window and watched the scenery change as we drove on, I praised God for second chances, for wake up calls and for His great love. I looked up at Warren beside me and my heart felt full. I am blessed. I have love. That's all I need.

After such an emotionally draining week, I felt a renewed determination to live my life with more purpose. To have more intention in everything I do. We had no warning of hitting that deer, and in the same way, we have no warning of what tomorrow will bring in our own personal
fate.

It's time to shine.*

Forever Changed

2007-07-27T09:26:00.000-07:00

I have so much to say, but every time I've gone to type something this week, I'm left staring at a blank screen, tears welling up in my eyes.

I've been so overcome with grief and sadness for a guy I only knew of, never really having any real contact with him. My heart just aches for his wife and his family. The tears just won't stop.

As I've spent a great deal of time reading related blogs, comments and facebook entries this week, I've been overwhelmed by this amazing Christian community holding up the Toews family. In a time that seems impossible, where the tears are never-ending and an extreme amount of exhaustian has taken over, all we can do is hold them up in prayer and believe that God will do the rest.

We question. We ask, Why God? Why Nate? And why at such a young age when he was clearly living his life for You? But in the end, I have really been snapped back to a humble reality this week - God is in control and He will decide. Questioning is an endless circle. We are human. We can't possibly understand God's ways. We're small, standing before our Big God. He has always known that Nathan would come home to live with Him at this time, even back on the day he was born. He knows that timeline for all of us.

We seem to think we're invincible. I often do. We get so caught up in day-to-day stuff, that we almost get cocky and lazy in how we're spending our time here on earth and how we're fostering our relationships. Nate's story has richly affected me. I've never felt this way before, it's something pretty big. I believe that God is doing amazing things though this incredibly tragic situation, and changing people through it. Talk about an intense sense of timing. On a day where the Toews family experienced a horrific death in the family, they also experienced this miracle birth, welcoming Caleb Nathan into the family. That's our God.

I stand, I stand in awe of You.

How am I living my life? What would people say about me if I died? It's been a huge question in my mind this week. I can't shake it. It has brought me to a quiet place.

I thought Jamie said it so well in her last blog entry. We are God's. Our bodies are not our own. They are simply shells, a holding space for our time here on earth. What an encouragement to know that Nathan isn't dead. Physically, he's gone, but he is alive and well, prasing his Father in Heaven. That's a blessing.

More than anything, I want to wrap my arms around Rosanna and the rest of the family during this time. I am praying for you constantly. Time will ease this excrutiating pain you feel. It will. You will always miss Nate, always. But we serve a loving Father who understands and will walk with you the whole way. You will never be alone.

I am forever changed.*

Rustic Heaven

2007-07-16T20:47:00.001-07:00

A much needed getaway. That's what this weekend was. Life has been a ball of chaos for us for the past month and getting away with some friends was just what the doctor ordered.

On Saturday, Steve & Sandy Dick and Warren & I packed up the Escape and headed for the lake, leaving our worries behind. It was wonderful. Wonderful. Steve's family owns a cabin near Echo Bay, and we were able to use it for 2 days. We had some really great talks, laughed tons (as usual) and enjoyed each other. God is good.

Later on that evening, Brad & Angel joined us, bringing even more life to the party, as you can imagine. We chilled by the fire....until the lightening storm hit, that is....ate lots of food, and cozied up to watch a movie until 2am. It's so much fun doing stuff with other married couples. I really felt blessed this weekend.

I guess more than anything, I thank God for friends. Friends who share the same values as us and give us so much support. What a blessing.
And between the three couples, we're all somewhat at the same stage in life. Steve & Sandy have recently started their own business - Steve's a journeyman electrician and he recently started his own company, Leading Edge Electric. Brad & Angel are really making a go of ranching and everything that includes. And Warren & I just bought the practice and are also business owners, learning, growing and trying hard. So this weekend was the perfect ticket for getting away from it all and focusing on having fun and relaxing. No cell phones. No emails. No meetings. It's something I think we should do more often.*

Just Me.

2007-07-13T11:24:00.000-07:00

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Nope. Not that I know of.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Yesterday.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Yeah, I think so. It's kind of a mix of writing and printing.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Oven Roasted Turkey Breast.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Not yet….we’re excited to someday….

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Absolutely!

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? A lot? No. But sometimes.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yup.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Do I have a death wish? No. There's your answer.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Don't really like it.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Anal / super organized Cyndy? Uh...yeah.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Physically? Nope. In character and personhood? Yeah.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? All of it! Aw man, I could live off of that stuff. I really love frozen yogurt.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Their eyes and hair.

15. RED OR PINK? Well, it depends on what you're talking about. Hmmm... if you're talking about candy, I like red. Red means cherry and you usually can't go wrong with cherry flavoured anything...unless it's medicine. Ugghh barf. But that's a whole different story. Now if you're talking about sunburns, then pink, for sure. See, red would mean "Ouch!" and pink would mean a mild uncomfortableness, and a soon-to-be tan. But let's see...are we talking clothes? Then red. Definitely red. Never been a big pink girl. The odd time, yes. Not usually. ...So again, it depends.

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I get frustrated at my intense need to have control and order in every area of my life. I'm a neat freak. I'm an organizational freak. I look at spontanious people and I think, "I could do that..." and then I snap back to reality and realize, yeah right. I also hate it when I lack confidence in certain situations and around certain people because I do consider myself to be confident in who I am. I'm learning. I'm growing. God is changing me and it's a continual process.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? My family. Mom, Dad, Steve & Vicki, Jon & Karen. It sucks. Distance sucks. I hate it. Meh.

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? Whatever. I do like reading through them, though, I'm not gonna lie to you. Especially when work is slow and time's dragging.

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? No pants....a sundress & silver ballet flats.

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? A big old Mr. Freeze and it was perfect.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? C-95 FM.

22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Baby Blue.

23. FAVORITE SMELLS? Summer. Hardware stores. Warren's cologne. Cookies in the oven. BBQing. Chlorine.

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? A client at work...

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? N/A

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Much to Warren's dismay, uhhh... no thanks.

27. HAIR COLOR? Blonde. Highlighted. Summery.

28. EYE COLOR? Light Blue.

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Nope.

30. FAVORITE FOOD? Cheesey hashbrowns. Tacos. Shishkabobs. Apple crisp. Stir fry.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings. Definitely. No matter how predictable. Love 'em.

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Waitress.

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? See #19.

34. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer. Summer. Summer.

35. HUGS OR KISSES? Hugs.

36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Apple crisp. Ice cream.

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Skip.

38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Skip.

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? I'm not.

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Something Optometry-ish. I can't remember the name.
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? Craig Ferguson. Hilarious. Absolutely hilarious.

42. FAVORITE SOUND? Mikayla & Brookie laughing.

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? I don't know.

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Haiti or Europe.

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Sketching.

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Leamington, ON. Oh, how I miss it...

Seasons of Change

2007-05-31T12:42:00.000-07:00

Haven't posted in a while. We've been here and there and everywhere. Life has been full of change and a new season has come into our life...in every sense of the word.

First and foremost, spring is here. How sweet is that? Thank the good Lord for flowering trees, higher temps and most importantly, no snow. Spring in Stonebridge means mud, mud and more mud. Being a new community means no lawns, no landscaping, no trees (yet). It's very brown. However, things are booming in our little corner of the city and we are excited about all that is yet to happen within these next few months of summer. Last week, our driveway was poured. And who woulda thought we'd get so excited about cement....but it's our cement and that makes all the difference. We're one step closer to getting rid of the mud pit. It's so great having our own little place to make a home. Love it.

Well, as of last week, we are the proud owners of an optometry practice. Yup. After many months of lawyers, accountants, banks and meetings gallore, Warren has bought the clinic from Dr. Zaleschuck and we now are happy business owners. It's a huge step forward and we're extremely thankful for what God is doing in our life. There's a lot to be done, a lot to learn and a lot to organize, but every ounce of me is proud of Warren and the guy he is. Here's to a full heart.

Work at The Willows is busy as heck. Now that the golf season has exploded, my desk has become dumping grounds for contracts, banquet arrangement sheets, booking forms and menus. Busy and diggin' it. That's me. For the most part. There have been moments, trust me. But today, as I look out my window, the sun shines brightly and I know that I'm right where I'm meant to be. I feel that God has been using me in different ways at work and that alone, gives me confidence.

Welp, gonna jet. Moving on to the next thing...and I know there are many.*

HOT!

2007-05-05T16:42:00.000-07:00

...enough said.

"...and I think to myself, what a wonderful world."

2007-04-16T12:12:00.000-07:00

Couldn't have asked for a nicer weekend. The temp reached a high of 21 degrees on Saturday!! Seriously. I hope this means spring has sprung, but you never know out here. I'm usually an optimist, but this winter hit us hard. I ache for warmth. You'd never know it from the dullness in the pics, but things really are feeling different. Now we just need to get that grass greened up and the trees budding. Oooohhhh I love spring!

Saturday night, Warren and I had a picnic down by the river. That was really fun. There were so many people out and about on all of the trails. Whoa. As soon as the good weather hits this city, people take it seriously. There's no time to laze around. After our supper, we took a long walk on the trails and just enjoyed laughing and talking and being silly. It was great. Our evening ended with a trip to the 'walk-up' Dairy Queen on 8th Street, which is actually open already. That is definitely a sign of a season's change in Saskatoon.
It always takes a little extra work to make it through a Monday at work....but knowing that the warmth will greet me as I open the front doors of the clubhouse and head out towards my car at the end of the day puts that smile back on my face.*

Numb

2007-04-09T11:41:00.000-07:00

My heart feels quiet and sad today. Shock and awe has taken over my otherwise very ordinary Monday. I just found out that Anna Wall, a mom to four very special people I went to Youth with back home (Anita, Eva, Johnny & Emily) lost her battle with pancreatic cancer on Saturday. I can't even explain to you my emotions. I'm numb with heaviness.

In 2002, my mom battled a year of breast cancer. Honestly, it was the worst year of my life...and yet strangely the most memorible. I remember those long days. I hated seeing my mom that way. She looked so small, so bald, so sick. The spunk and fiestiness that used to describe her personhood was rarely seen anymore and our house felt like a gloomy place. I really hated seeing my dad so distraught. He's a fix-it kind of guy, up for anything, but this was one area in his life that was out of his hands. I remember a multitude of feelings and emotions. I remember getting so angry with people when they'd give us a hug and say they were thinking of us and then get in their cars and drive home to hang out with their own moms who were happy and healthy. It didn't seem fair. Though that sounds so selfish, those feelings were so real to me. I had moved home from Saskatoon (where I had been living at the time) to live at home and be "mom" for a year. Anger clouded my life and I went through such a time of fury and hurt with God. It was a real transitional period for me and Him. I wanted my mom to be able to see me get married. I wanted to have her with me when I had my kids. The human imagination is a powerful thing and the "what if's" overwhelmed me.

I guess the walk down memory lane has brought me back to a very humble place. Why did my mom live on? God could have taken her home in an instant. How can I be of encouragement to these friends when the ending to my story looks so different from theirs?

In the end, I believe that God is in control and His plans are far greater and far deeper than we could ever grasp. I believe that God will meet us where we're at. Honestly, I have no idea or any real words of understanding regarding my mom's current cancer-free existence and the death of those who have fought for the same goal - to live on. I have no idea why some people suffer and others breeze through life with minor issues. But I am in awe at His power and the strength we can pull from that connection with Him. And I know that my mom's fate and her life will carry on as a testiment of God's grace and the fact that He is alive and here.

All we can do is hold on to what we know and that is that God is good and though we don't understand everything He does or the time in which He does it, God is still good. I long to be an encouragement to the Wall family today and the long days to come. My heart hurts today.*

Easter Egg Art

2007-04-05T14:32:00.000-07:00

I'm in tradition mode. I'm a sucker for those moments that make life memorible and faithfully reminiscent each year. Being as this weekend is Easter, celebrating with the munchkins was a top priority. Soooo... Tuesday night, 'Uncle warren' and 'Auntie Cyndy' went over to Dave & Mel's to paint Easter eggs with the girls. It was great. Maybe we can make this a yearly event. Mikayla was very maticulous and careful with her decorating (aahhhh...that's my little artist!) and Brookie kept trying to lick them all. Hee hee. It was a really fun evening.

Phone Calls, Soggy Cupcakes and Castles

2007-04-02T10:36:00.000-07:00

Well........what a birthday!!!! What a stinkin' sweet birthday!!! Friday, March 30th marked my 26th year in this world, as we know it. And what a shabang it was.

I went to work and (of course) my mom called me from Ontario and sang not one, but two verses of Happy Birthday over the phone...Oh my! Can we say "Oma"??? For those of you who didn't know my Oma Hildebrand (my mom's mom) when she was alive, my mom is becoming ridiculously similar to her in most everything she does as time goes on. It's very funny, actually.

Following the scerenade, I was called from my office out front where I found my little nieces, Mikalya and Brooklyn greeting me with a cupcake with a single lit candle on top. I melted. Kayla's eyes were huge and she looked so excited. Well, needless to say, the two munchkins devoured my treat, leaving only a few soggy morsels at the bottom of the container for me. It was great! What a boost to my already fun day.

Then, once I got home from work, Warren called me on his way home and told me to pack my overnight bag.....we were spending the night at the Bes, in Saskatoon. WWWOOOOOWWWW!!!

What a treat!! So, off we went and enjoyed a fine evening of fine dining downtown (2nd Ave Grill), hot tubbing and watching movies in our room. It was very romantically unexpected and I was over the moon. What a day!!! What a happy, happy birthday!!! Now, if only I could be queen every day....*

The Willows

2007-03-26T19:46:00.000-07:00

A door has been opened. I've been given a sweet opportunity to be something big. The nerves are there. The butterflies are doing their thing. But the giddyness has overtaken them both. Let me explain.

I work at The Willows Golf & Country Club in Saskatoon, one of the swankiest places to golf or hold a function in the city. I love it. Seriously. Out of any job I've ever had, I really feel that this is it. I've found my niche. It's a really neat place. It's luxurious, it's very people-oriented, everyone I work with is fantastic, and let's be honest, it's just plain pretty. (both of the pics on this post are of The Willows - the first being the clubhouse I work in and the second being part of the golf course) I started last September and have been working in the office, doing reception,

invoicing, (you name it) ever since. Life's been good. Another perk is the fact that Warren and I live in Stonebridge, which is literally 3 minutes away from this place. Love it.

So anyway, I was recently offered a very different, higher-up position. And.......I took it. You are now reading the blog of the new Events Coordinator at the Willows. Eeeeekkkk!!! I know. I'm freaking out. So what this means is a few things. Any and all functions, events, weddings, meetings, banquets, and parties go through me. I'm the one who sits down with the bride-to-be and her mom and goes through all of the possibilities, the planning and the ideas for her big day. I'm the one who meets with the president of a big corporation to plan out his big annual meeting to be held at our clubhouse. I'm the one who coordinates and juggles 5 different events within one day. Once again, Eeeeekkkk!!! Last week was my first week and I gotta say, it's a big learning curve. I was so tired after each day. But you know what? I'm diggin' it. I'm ready for the challenge. I'm able to really be creative in this new position too, which is a very good thing. This is gonna be great and I feel very lucky and blessed. I'm waitin' on summer and a new golf season to start. Hope they're ready for me.*

The Thaw

2007-03-08T13:21:00.000-08:00

Let me just say that I am one happy girl with the way things are shaping up outside. Um hmm. I look out the window and guess what I see? Water. Lots and lots of water. The snow has begun its melt and where I normally would find it in me to gripe about the soupiness and mud surrounding our poor little house, I am bound and determined to smile about it. This year, my attitude will be different. That's right.

I've been at my wits' end this past month at the ridiculous amount of snow and the freezing temps that continue to hit us hard out here in the prairies. Swear words. Actual, full on swear words have graced my thoughts many days. Mostly because I'm beyond tired of my long walk up to the clubhouse from staff parking at work where I basically feel like my face is gonna break off each morning. And even if I wanted to cry, I couldn't because my tears would freeze and we all know that would be a disaster.

BUT, finally, I think I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Bring on the mud! Bring on the floods! It's all part of the process to what I would consider a very happy ending. Warren and I have wondered if we should invest in a canoe so I can paddle my way to work. Hee hee. Ah well, I am ready for some warmth and sunshine. I can hardly wait for spring. It's killing me.*

Spending the Night With Oscar

2007-02-28T11:49:00.000-08:00

Anyone who knows me well knows my die hard obsession with Hollywood award shows. I LOVE them. And anyone who knows this about me would also most likely know that the Oscars is the most important one - kind of the big finale at the end. The Oscars is the fanciest, the biggest and the most elaborate of them all.

For as long as I can remember, I've spent Oscar night infront of the TV, watching, admiring and closely following the stars as they walk the red carpet and are interviewed by entertainment show hosts, such as Mary Hart, Ryan Seacrest and Ben Mulrooney, to name a few. I don't know why I get so caught up in all of the glitz - Warren just laughs at me - but I'm not gonna lie to ya, I love the glamour. I love the gowns. I love the couple sightings. I love seeing who took who and who's wearing what, who's presenting and who's gonna win. I love the speeches. I love the emotion and the anticipation. There's something special and thrilling about Oscar night and I've always loved it. Actually, all the Bartel girls always have.

This year, Mel had me over and we had our own little Oscars night. It was great! She had made some fun snacks and we munched and gabbed together for the whole evening infront of the TV. It was really fun. My mom even called us halfway through to see who's dress we liked the best, who we thought would win, etc. Hee hee.

And so, the highlights. I thought Ellen did a fantastic job hosting. She's a hoot. I get such a kick out of her. I was thrilled that Jennifer Hudson won - talk about a comeback. First she's booted off American Idol and now she's won an Oscar! That's magic. Oooh... and I loved it when Jaden Smith and Abigail Breslin presented. So cute. It was kind of refreshing to have two little kids up there. I love watching guys like Clint Eastwood and Steven Spielberg - they're sensational - legends of our time. Man, have they accomplished lots in their careers, artistically. It's inspirational to me. Okay, so let's talk dresses. I thought Helen Mirren looked beautiful - she looks so glamorous for her age. Penelope Cruz - very feminine and romantic with a modern funk, Maggie Gyllenhaal - very old Hollywood, and of course, the always favorite Reese Witherspoon. Are we loving the hair, ladies? She's just doing her thing. The nasties? I was bummed at Gwyneth's choice - can we say Mother Earth meets the fish lady? Eewww! What was she thinking? And what about Meryl Streep? I love her, but c'mon...what was that, a trench coat? That was shocking, considering her latest movie was 'The Devil Wears Prada'. You'd think she'd step it up a notch.

All in all, a great success. Another beautiful and wonderful evening full of style, class and surprises. And it all happend at the Oscars.*

Squeals, Giggles and the Shock of a Lifetime

2007-02-26T08:29:00.000-08:00

Something fantastic has just happend. You know those moments in life where something completely catches you off guard in the most wonderful way and all you can possibly do is utter a small but excited squeal? Almost a gasp. Your heart begins to pound against your chest and your eyes are huge. It's something you've always known would happen...it was just a matter of when.

Friday, I got the call. About 1:30pm, I answered with my usual, "Good afternoon, The Willows, Cyndy speaking", only to hear my little brother on the other end, rather than the expected golf member or possible client inquiring about room rentals or facility details. What the heck? Why was he calling me at work...from Ontario?? All at once, he started laughing and asked, "So, uh, I was wondering how you'd feel about adding another sister to the family..." What? WHATTT??? Are you kidding me??

Yup. That's right. Jon and Karen are freakin' engaged!!!

This is huge. First of all, he's my little brother...and secondly, he's a weiner!!! Karen is incredible. I love her to bits and have considered her my sister for years already - she has litterally been a part of our family for about 7 years. She's come on family vacations with us, slept over and been a part of Christmas morning and been there for each and every holiday. Good times, Kar!

These guys started dating somewhere around grade 10, I think. Nuts. I remember when they were both in grade 9 (I was in grade 12) and I remember Kar bobbing all around the school with her short little curly fro - so cute. I remember when Jon had a forever crush on this little girl....and now here we are. You have no idea how stolked I am about this. I have always said that when they get engaged, it's gonna be huge. Well, it is. I'm blowing my mind here.

Guys, just wanted to send out a few whoop, whoops and let you know that I am so, so excited for you two and what's ahead. God has blessed you both for years and I can only imagine how great the future will be. I also just wanted to tell you how much I value you both as friends in my life - we have so much fun! You are a true example of how I think a relationship should be done. I admire you both a lot. Keep going. Jon, this is fantastic - you stud...and Kar, I can hardly believe that we really and truly are gonna be sisters!! My giddyness continues...*

Now, That's More Like It!

2007-02-23T11:53:00.000-08:00

Well, it's official. Some really good friends of ours - Tyler & Nelly - are engaged! We are SO excited for these two. They're such great people. We love them to bits.

Tyler is Warren's best friend from Optometry in Waterloo. Practically brothers. He's the best. The guys did their residency together in Alabama during their last year. They have a really cool friendship.

And Nelly was my roomie for my 2nd year in Graphic Design in Waterloo - we shared an apartment. She's adorable. Someone I love and admire for her happy spirit and spunky wit. We had ice cream together almost every night - it became an obsession. Hee hee. She bought me an actual ice cream maker for our wedding!

Tyler and Nelly are both optometrists and are living in Vancouver, BC. We can hardly wait to get out there to see them and celebrate this new chapter in their life. Hopefully in the next month or two...

This is kind of a funny picture actually - it's at Warren and Tyler's grad weekend in June of last year, but it was the best one I had of the four of us. We sure do miss hanging out together!! BIG CONGRATS!! Can't wait for what's ahead...*

My Cup Runneth Over...

2007-02-13T16:26:00.000-08:00

Oh boy. The thing with being an auntie is that it fills your heart so full with love for these little munchkins, that I can't even imagine what it will
be like to have my own someday. We had Dave, Mel and the babes over for supper last week and as usual, we were entertained. I think it's so funny watching the girls because I see so much of Mel and I in them. The Mother Hen and the "I don't have to listen to you" Kid. Love it. I'm a very lucky auntie.*

A Sad Sort of Day

2007-02-09T11:57:00.000-08:00

Today I'm really missing two very special people in my life - my two best friends from home, Lish and Genelle - we've been together since
our diaper days.

I'm finding it really tough to faithfully keep in touch and make regular phone calls, emails, etc. since moving out here. I really hate it. I hate being so far apart and having to rely on these things to stay up-to-date and close with these girls. It's so frustrating, especially when all I want is to be with them - spend an evening vegging in our sweats over a bowl of popcorn and share what's been on our hearts with each other. There's nothing quite like a childhood friend - they are the ones who truly know you and have been a part of your history, the very thing that makes you who you are. I guess today, I especially wanted to say how much I love you, Genelle and Lish and to know that even though we're not always great at regular phonecalls, etc, I cherrish you and miss you with my whole heart. You guys are extremely special to me.....I can't wait to see you again, whenever that may be.*

Ode to My Ford Focus

2007-02-01T16:56:00.000-08:00

I got stuck on the way to work today....real stuck. There is SO MUCH snow out here, it's ridiculous. I'm still not in the mindset of a true Saskatchewan resident yet, so of course, I never think to pack an extra touque, scarf, gloves, snowpants, shovel, etc. in my car at all times, like everyone else I know. So here I am, in my flimsy little dresspants and dressy coat, FREEZING in the -22 degree weather - sooooooo cold!!!! People were coming in shifts to try and get me out and no one seemed to be able to do it. Warren was out of town early this morning at a clinic, so he was no where in sight. By the time things started moving, there were five men around my car. Kinda embarassing. Kinda funny. Hee hee. Aw, my little Focus. She had a rough start to her day. But after 45 minutes of pushing, freezing, heeve-hoing, and freezing some more, I was back on track and at work. I've felt chilled ever since...*

A Good Mix

2007-01-26T22:23:00.000-08:00

Not much new to report.

It's been a bit since my last post, so I figured I'd empty my mind on screen and see for myself what's actually been going on these past few weeks. Lots, actually. And then, not a whole lot. Hmmmm...

I'll admit it. I feel I've run into a mild case of the winter blues. I always find the months of January and February a struggle to mull through 'cause they're so cold and blustery, they feel so dang long (especially in the west) and there really isn't any special holidays or occasions to anticipate. Meh. Once spring hits, I'm good. I've always been a person who loves to have something to look forward to, to get excited about. Ah well, I'm still incredibly blessed and pumped abouy my life, so that's good enough for me. I'll look forward to summer...

Warren and I continue down the road of life-changing decisions, regarding his practice. Things in that area are good. Real good. We're in the midst of deciding to buy or buy in and associate with another....all good things. Whenever we get stressed, we look at each other, shrug our shoulders and laugh and realize, Shoot! At least we have options! We know that there are many people desperate for work. We're in a very good place.

I can't seem to get enough of being an auntie. What a treat to be living in the same city as my nieces. It never gets old. Mikayla and Brookie continue to maintain my state of awe at how creative and hilarious God is. Those two are fantastic! I thoroughly enjoy my conversations with MJ, which are shockingly mature and of course, full of drama. Oh man, how I can relate to that little munchkin, it's pretty funny. Hee hee. And then Brookie. She's so mobile and carefree and she's trying sooo hard to get her words out. I love witnessing the new words and the fresh discoveries of toddlers. It's like a miracle right before your eyes - pretty sweet. Pretty amazing. The more I'm with the girls, the more excited I get to embark on the journey of motherhood myself. Not yet...but sometime.

Work at The Willows is good. It's a bit slower these days (obviously) without a golfing season in full swing (no pun intended) but still humming with constant events, meetings, weddings, conventions, etc. I get a real joy out of visiting with the members and other people while going about my day. It's fun. I am very much anticipating the warm weather and fresh season to bring about busyness and excitement. Should be good.

Well, other than these few tidbits (I do hate that word, actually), it's time to shut 'er down and go grab a treat. I'm thinking it's either gonna be ice cream with orange juice (aka the Ronny Bartel Homemade Orange Julius invention that continues to blow my mind each time I have it....mmmmmm.....) or popcorn. Ha ha. Who am I kidding....here's hoping we're not out of ice cream just yet.

See ya.*

A Mexican Fiesta and Sugar Cookies

2007-01-02T08:13:00.000-08:00

This Christmas will be tucked away at the top of my stash of incredible memories forever. It was....well....perfect, if I can be so bold in saying that. I will charge ahead here and give you my best attempt at a recap of the eleven days I spent with my family over the holidays - though I know already that my musings and recollections won't do it justice...even if I do throw in a few photos. And yet, I feel a need to try to organize my thoughts and take myself away from my present situation to reminicse. So, here goes.

December 16th (which was the day I had been waiting for for months) brought the long-awaited flight home to see my family once again. Dave, Mel and the critters, along with Warren and I, flew home on the first flight out of Saskatoon that morning. It was early, but we were pumped and in high spirits. It was amazing to be together with my family again. Words cannot express.

The next morning, we left for our 6-day vactation to Mexico, where we stayed at this beautiful 5-star resort on the Riviera, just outside of Cancun. It was easily my favorite vacation I've been on, up to date. It was just a good, good time together as family. Many high points. Our main reason for the trip, of course, was to enjoy a week of chill time and hanging out together before my brother Steve and Vicki got married on the beach on day number 5 of our time in Mexico. There were 18 of us in total. A really good group, consisting mainly of family from both sides and then a few extra friends too.

I love vacactions even more, now that we're all adults. It's a lot of fun to just be able to do our own thing and enjoy it together at our own pace. There was absolutely no stress on this trip, no real scheduele. We took our watches off on the first day and didn't look at them until we were heading home. It was a week of sleeping in, eating too much (and the food was delicious), drinking too much (I was hooked on daqueries and pina coladas), lounging by the pools and playing beach volleyball by the ocean. The evenings were wonderful - we'd usually all go out for a nice dinner together and then relax in the big lounge area, sipping drinks, playing games, listening to the live entertainment, dancing and visiting. Lots of laughter on this trip. Lots. It was good for the soul.

And then the wedding. Oh...the wedding. It was quite possibly the most beautiful wedding I've ever been at. So small, so intimate, so personal. Steve looked amazing and Vick, she was truly a vision. The wedding was very beachy and casual. We were all barefoot. All of us. Jon played guitar as they walked down the isle and Dave married them. Their vows were really sweet. The wedding itself was set on the beach, right infront of the ocean. Down the isle they rolled a long white strip of material where they had sprinkled rose pedals from back to front. They stood under a simple trellis adonned with bright tropical flowers and ivy. They had set up about three mini rows of white covered chairs to seat the family. It was just a incredibly romantic. It really was. For the reception, we all sat at a big table on the deck, overlooking the waterfront. We enjoyed a delicious dinner, a few speeches were made, a few wisecracks were said and then on with the dancing! It was a blast. The whole shindig ended and we all saw the two lovebirds off in the lobby, as their taxi whisked them off to their honeymoon destination - another resort in the area.

And so, our trip in Mexico soon came to an end and though we were sad to leave this tropical oasis, the celebrating and making of memories was not over yet. It was back to Mom and Dad's place (Ontario) where we enjoyed Christmas festivities and some more chill time together.

Christmas in at the Bartel house consisted of lots of eating (namely Christmas goodies), loud music, evenings by the fire, games and of course, a whole lot of good conversation. We spent a day at Grandma's, Christmas Eve at church and Christmas morning eating crepes specifically prepared by Dad and Kayla, as we had anticipated. It was fun to, once again, experience Christmas through the eyes of two munchkins. It somehow seems to warm your heart.

What a holiday. What a wonderful holiday.

Today, I find myself feeling somewhat sad and heavy-hearted at the fact that this magical eleven days of my life, a time that was so strongly anticiapted, is over. And yet, I can smile and smirk at the memories that will forver be embedded in my head of this special time that was shared by the people I love. And that is why we keep going. Because there is always something more, something to cling to and get silly about. I'm looking forward the next big thing, whatever that may be.*

Snow Babies

2006-12-14T11:22:00.000-08:00

Since moving out here earlier this year, I have had to get used to the fact that Saskatchewan is a snowy place for basically most of the year...well, not really, but it just feels like that to this summer girl. Though I live for skirts, tanks and flip flops, I have had a new appreciation for the snow this year, especially around the holidays. I thought I'd stick a few pics of my two favorite girls enjoying this winter wonderland.*

A Masterpiece, After All These Years

2006-12-12T12:10:00.000-08:00

RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER® recounts the tale of a shy, young reindeer whose Christmas spirit is dampened because his shiny red nose has made him the laughing stock of all Christmastown. Frustrated by their inability to fit in, Rudolph and his friend Hermey, the Elf who wants to be a dentist, set out on their own. However, they soon find themselves pursued by the Abominable Snowmonster. They flee to the island of Misfit Toys in the Arctic wilderness where Yukon Cornelius, a prospector they meet along the way, comes to their rescue. Returning to Christmastown, they learn that bad weather may cause Christmas to be canceled. But Rudolph's headlight--his illuminated nose--saves Christmas by serving as a beacon to guide Santa's sleigh.

Last night, after lots of flipping, I stumbled across this old 1964 classic - also a Bartel favorite for many, many years. I was ecstatic, and forced a less-than-enthused Warren to sit and watch(enjoy) with me. By today's standards, the animation is terrible, but I think it's adorable and I love it every year I see it. The message is so clear and so relavent, even years after the making.*

The Magic

2006-12-07T07:22:00.000-08:00

We've been crazy busy this last stretch before Mexico. I love it though. I have always loved the Christmas rush and the hussel and bussel of a busy city in December. As for the old cranks who didn't learn enough from their mothers about which fingers are inappropriate to flash at the rest of us when they're edgy, they're missing out. Believe me, an angry shopper is an unecessary setback for those of us who are out and about, Starbucks gingerbread latte in hand, humming an old carol, and looking to have a good time. Yes, it's busy and yes there are lots of people - more than the norm - and yet, let's all chill and enjoy all of the little hints of magic that surround us throughout this season we all claim to love so much. That's what I'm doing and I've felt so in love with this time of year, once again.

This is Warren and my first Christmas together in our own place. It's been really special. We got ourselves a real tree - just a little guy that smells so wonderful each time we come into the room - and we decorated it with MJ and Brookie a week or two ago. It was a hoot. Of course, the lower half of the tree looked pretty flashy (and loaded) while the rest of it was pretty bear. Ah well, kids are good for laughs and making memories with. Kayla was so particular about her placement of ornaments, while Brookie just sat on the floor, grunting, clapping and eating all of our Christmas cookies. Everyone was happy.

To me, Christmas is 100% about family and spending time together. It doesn't even matter so much what we're doing anymore, as I get older, I seem to hang on to the memories and the anticipation of being together more than ever. I gotta tell ya, knowing that in just over a week, we'll be squishing the white sands of Mexico between our toes from beach chairs, drink in hand, makes me very happy.

Songs I'm really into these days:

How to Save a Life - The Fray
Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol
More Than Words - Extreme
Crash - Dave Matthews Band
River - Sarah McLachlan
Wintersong - Sarah McLachlan

Jon, don't slack on the Christmas chain, you silly nugget. Keep the tradition alive.

Nine days and counting...*

Grocceries

2006-11-30T07:30:00.000-08:00

Time to get grocceries. Ah, the groccery store. It almost feels like a creative expedition to me - coming up with new recipes and concoctions as I shuffle up and down the isles. I always start with a list, which I generally complete, but let's be honest, there are always a few fun and unexpected add ons - some to satisfy my ever present sweet tooth (obviously), and though he would never admit to it, Warren too, delights in finding treats in the pantry every now and then.

And so, the list (or at least the list I'm going in with):

broccoli crowns (probably 3-4)
asparagus
Christmas oranges
lettuce
baby potatoes
peppers (red, green)
spinach dip
soft taco wraps
deli meat (1/2 lb. black forrest ham, shaved)
chicken breasts
frozen corn
stir fry veggies
milk
eggnog (obviously)
cran/rasp juice
egg noodles
cous cous
sour cream
pasta sauce - Classico tomato & basil
liquid chicken broth
parmesean cheese
cereal - probably Captian Crunch
chips (x2)
Tostitos rounds
pop (Diet Coke)
Christmas chocolates (maybe Turtles...oooohhh)
vanilla ice cream
apple sauce

Whew! It's gonna be a biggie. Here's to good food and good times.*

I'll Be Home For Christmas

2006-11-27T15:12:00.000-08:00

Before I get started, please note that I know I am totally copying Jon's Christmas blog entry - even some of the points - but only because we're family and I didot him on many on the list. We grew up in the same house...c'mon.

So, my favorite things about Christmas:

- RELAXATION - no setting the alarm for work the next day. We're all home and we are extremely chill and relaxed. We wake up late, have crepes (which only Dad knows how to make) and coffee in our pj's, while listening to one of Mom's Christmas CD's LOUD in the family room. Almost always, someone has to make a trip to the mall to buy something last minute... or to the shop to finish "tweaking" their special project for Mom.

- Mmmmm...eggnog....

- Christmas music - love it. LOVE it!! You can scoff if you wish but I really cherrish old CD's like Evie's Christmas and Kenny Rogers & Dolly Parton Christmas. They never get old to me. They just feel like home.

- Finding the perfect gift for someone...and knowing that they're gonna love it....and then watching their eyes light up when they open it.

- The song, I Want a Hippopotomous for Christmas.

- The tree - when it's all lit up and glowing in a darkened family room, close to the fireplace. Beautiful.

- Oh, the Christmas chain. A Bartel family tradition.

- Mom's huge stash of peanuts, nuts, Quality Street chocolates and Jelly Bellies on the coffee table. No one really knows how to stop eating them...

- Dad obsessing over his esspresso and forcing a cup into every empty hand, convinced there's nothing quite like it.

- The bright pots of poinsettias Mom has strategically placed in every nook and cranny around the house. Oh...and the Dickens Christmas village above the living room fireplace - it gets bigger every year, with tradition. I love coming home to a decked-out house.

- The famous claymation Rudolph Christmas special on TV - with the abominable snowman and Yukon Cornelious... every year.

- Wrapping presents.

- Dad leading Christmas carols at church on Christmas morning...every single year for as long as I can remember.

- Knowing that every year, Mom will get up at 5:00am, Dad will act like Scrooge, we'll all jump on him to get him out of bed - it's such an act and it's the same every year, but it's somehow funny every time... that there's one gift that will make Mom cry every year... that Dad will always genuinely love it from the bottom of his heart if you get him a) needle nose plyers, b) a flashlight, or c) a shammee

- Wondering when it happend that Christmas shifted from you and your siblings opening gifts to watching Mikayla and Brookie opening gifts...and being more than okay with it.

...And it all just gets better with age. I am such a sucker for this season and all of the tradiations and memories it includes. And to think I get to go home in a few short weeks to enjoy it all over again...*

Random

2006-11-22T12:59:00.000-08:00

Warren made supper last night. It was one of the two dishes he seems to excel at - omletes (the other being the tried and true Kraft Dinner, which he is convinced takes a certain level of skill to make properly). We had some good eatin'. Though I usually do love to cook and create in the kitchen, I was tired...still feeling kinda meh and ucky from my bout of flu that I've been fighting this week. He offered and I bit. And so, trying to forget about the splatters, the grease and the spills - in typical Warren fashion - I enjoyed a bacon/cheese/pepper filled omlete. Deeee-licious!

You Want an Update? I'll Give You an Update...

2006-11-20T20:42:00.000-08:00

Life - at large - is a very good thing. Man, has it been changing for me this past year. My world is so different from a short 11 months ago - when I was a single, Ontarioan (is that a word?), living under my parents' roof and working for the big guy. Wedding planning consumed my scheduele and dreams of becoming a wife consumed my thoughts. For months on hand, Warren and I were apart (yuck) and my evenings were full of phone calls from Alabama.

Now, fast forwarding to the present tense, I am a wife (of almost a year), living in Saskatoon, SK, in a new house we designed and had built. I work at the Willows Golf and Country Club and Warren's an Optometrist, practicing here in the city out of the Canada Building downtown. I'm finally living close to my big sister and bro-in-law and their two little munchkins, which I love...and far, far away from the rest of my family, which I hate. I am having so much fun being a little Martha Stewart in our very first home together - I really love cooking, cleaning and entertaining. Seriously. Our evenings are full of errands, phone calls, emailing, visiting with friends and family, and of course, watching our obsession on TV - Grey's Anatomy.

This summer was a busy one. We moved to Saskatoon at the end of June, right after Warren's grad - just in time for Brad (Warren's brother) and Angel's wedding. We love hanging out with these two - never a dull moment when you're in their company. Angel's my newest sister and I love that girl. She's a riot. One line after another.... Her and Brad are ranching out near Watrous, SK and living the cowboy life. Angel also has her own business on the go, which I think is pretty cool. It's a clothing company which she named "Halo Rodeo Co.", selling women's western wear. She's got some pretty trendy, out there stuff.

More recently, Warren's youngest brother, Devin, and his girlfriend, Laura, just got engaged. We're exstatic for them! Laura's a real sweetheart and we can't wait to complete our Toews family. I get another sister!! It's so great watching the two of them together - giddy, excited and anticipating a full life together. What a blessing. They are planning for a June 2007 wedding.

If the twinkling Christmas lights and store window displays haven't already given it away, I am overjoyed at the fact that the Christmas season has found us once again. In a month, we'll be busily wrapping presents, munching on sugar cookies and replacing our regular tv sitcoms with Christmas specials. Christmas carols - which for some reason, I never grow tired of - will serenade us from errand to errand and the smell of gingerbread and evergreen will overwhelm our senses. Yes, it's that wondeful time of year and Warren and I couldn't be more excited. And this year will be different once again....very different.

My brother, Steve, and his fiance, Vicki, will be getting married on the beaches of Mexico! Yeah, he is! And so, another wedding. And another sister!! Vick's the best! She's been a part of the fam for quite some time now and a good friend of mine for even longer. She brings out the best in Steve and we couldn't be happier. When she asked me to stand up for her as a bridesmaid, I was extremely honored. On December 17th (which happens to be mine and Warren's first anniversary), the whole gang flies down to the Mayan Riviera together for a full week of swimming, palm trees, tanning, pina coladas, and catching up. Hello good times! At the end of the week, on the 21st, those two crazy lovebirds will say their vows barefoot and on the beach. The following day, as they continue on to their honeymoon, the rest of us will fly home to Ontario for Christmas. There is much to look forward to and the season has only begun.

And so, life keeps moving. Changing. Evolving. Growing fuller. Whether it's new additions, old memories or things to look forward to, God continues to bless and push us forward. And that is a very good thing.*

The Miracle Worker

2006-11-17T15:45:00.000-08:00

So anyway, I've been doing a lot of heavy thinking lately. Hear me out.

I've been thinking a lot about trusting God and what that really means. Faith, I guess you could call it. Truly believeing in your heart that God will take care of you and the huge importance of letting go to what we hold onto so tightly to - letting Him lead. It's so easy for us to try to control everything....and then all at once, frantically ask God to bail us out when we're at our end, when we should have been doing that from the start.

These days, we are all so over-confident in ourselves, our lives, our work, that we've become too independent. We haven't lived through a war, we haven't lived through starvation, we haven't really had any reason to feel uncomfortable. Because of this, we don't see a need to rely on God because we're doing just fine. All of our accomplishments, all of our success is considered ours and somehow we feel we're earned it and deserved it for all that we've done.

Because of this, we are a generation who doesn't believe in miracles and doesn't really expect great things from God. We don't live with the same anticiaption that our grandparents had in waiting with this great hope and excitement for what God will do next - we don't have that same expectancy. We seem to become doubtful and edgy as soon as we can't deal with what's been placed in our laps, when we need to be looking to God sincerely for guidance and with anticipation of how He will follow through.

No, we're not living in the desert with Moses, but I still do believe in my heart of hearts that God does perform miracles every day. We have to learn to be quiet before Him and watch them unfold.

Just some thoughts as I wrap up my afternoon...*

Back in the Saddle...

2006-11-10T12:32:00.000-08:00

Okay, it has been almost a year since my last post, I know. The reason for starting my blog in the first place was to celebrate the countdown to my wedding. So, I've been Mrs. Toews for almost a year now and I think I'll try and bounce back into the blogging world. After all, it is a great way to keep the world informed and share what's on my mind and in my heart.

And so...hello again. This is my official re-introduction back into this modern form of diologue and expression.

Here's hopin' somebody will listen.*

It's me...Mrs. Cyndy Toews!

2006-01-09T22:27:00.000-08:00

Hello, hello!!! I'm back.....and I'm MARRIED!!
I am now officially Mrs. Cyndy Toews. Pretty neat, huh? What a whirlwind these past few weeks have been.

This first pic is me and my dad. Doesn't he look proud? I love it. This was taken minutes before we walked down the isle. We were both a little teary and so we made a pact to tell jokes as we walked down, so we would be okay. We did and we were all smiles. My dad's pretty special to me.

Oh, the wedding.....it was pure magic. I loved the day...everything about it. It was so much fun!!!! There's something really special and meaningful about packing everyone who's important and significant in your life from all areas and time spans into one room to celebrate with you. Humbling, actually.

What a beautiful day. I wish I could do it all over again. And Warren.....WOW! My heart was overflowing like it never has before. Love has a whole new meaning for me now. The fact that I get to share my life with this guy blows my mind. I praise God for bringing such a wonderful guy into my life, and blessing me with our marriage.

Next pic: Here we are, for the first time, Mr. & Mrs. Warren & Cyndy Toews!!!

I guess I also just wanted to take a sec to thank all of you who prayed for us during this time. I was a weeping mess the week before the wedding - nerves, sentiment, feeling overwhelmed, busyness and overload. But the wedding day was pretty close to tear free and I laughed lots, smiled tons and savored each moment. I truly had the best day of my life. Thank you! Prayer is a wonderful thing.

Next pic: Warren and I, with our wedding party close behind, leaving the church right after the ceremony for pictures with our photographer. We were so giddy here and were laughing about what had just happend...were we really, truly married??? What the heck??

The wedding itself was gorgeous!!! I can say that because my aunt and two ladies from our church (friends of my mom) decorated and it was unlike anything I've ever seen before. It was very Christmasy - suitable for December 17th. We had over 45 real Christmas trees packed with mini white lights and it looked like a fairytale. And it smelled wonderful!! It was decorated very rustic and crude - cedar roping, grapevine, rustic barnwood, logs, split-rail fencing, etc. I loved everything about it. The weather couldn't have been better!! It was really snowy - the fluffy kind. It was still - no wind. It was really sunny with blue skies. Oh man, what a blessing!

Well, there's much to be said...much to update you all on. And pictures. These are only a few candid pictures that my Uncle Jim took during the day...there's a lot more where they come from. But for tonight, I thought I'd give you a quick little glimpse of the day and give you a mini summary of my thoughts. I'll continue to show pics and update. But, it's late. I'm tired. And I think I'll go snuggle up to my hubby as I fall asleep. Love you guys!

The Weepy Willow

2005-12-09T14:59:00.000-08:00

Okay married women, I need some help and advice. I never thought I'd be this girl, but the past few days have brought me to many tears, many heart flutters and much stress, feeling completely overwhelmed...like I'm drowning or like all four walls are caving in on me.

Kay, it's like this. I think it's been hitting me that my life is about to change completely and in every area and this is a really scary thing for me. Fact is, Cyndy Bartel SUCKS at change, whether it's good or bad - in this case it's obviously a good change. My parents laugh when they remember many moons ago (I must have been about 6 or 7) when they bought me a new dresser for my room. I cried and cried because I didn't want to part with the one I already had - it was familiar...comfortable. Now, multiply that by 1000 percent and that's how I've been feeling the last few days. It's such a mix. I'm ecstatic beyond belief about getting married, being a wife, living with Warren, etc. It's just all so HUGE to me when I'm standing at the beginning of it all. SO out of my comfort zone. Yesterday we packed up all of our stuff and my room and moved most of it to our new appartment. I cried myself silly (in secret) packing up my room...my life...everything that I've known. Am I insane??? Have any of you girls felt like this when you were going through all of the big stuff days before you headed for the altar??

I guess I want to ask for your prayers too. I don't want these emotions to cloud my next few days and mask what this really is. This is such a fun and exciting time and I am head over heels in love with Warren. I pray that I'll be able to keep it all in perspective and enjoy it all, soaking it all in. Hit me back, if you have any advice.

The Deep End of the Ocean

2005-12-01T15:34:00.000-08:00

I've been feeling really deep and contemplative lately. Lots of tears, laughs and reminiscing has been taking place in the quiet of my heart and the secrecy of my bedroom. There's lots on my mind these days and my heart is overflowing (as you can well imagine). I just got the new Carrie Underwood album (which is amazing, by the way) and I was listening to the song, Jesus Take The Wheel, and I suddenly felt my eyes well up with tears and an awfully big lump in my throat. I've realized that God and me haven't been as strong as we used to be. That area of my life has been strange since my mom's cancer. The world's a funny place. I've slacked and let myself drift. It's not that I'm angry or frustrated with Him, it's just that I can get so consumed by my life, my own desires and my to do lists that I literally forget to include God in my day. I only remember or make a point to talk with God when I'm at a crossroads or need a hand. I used to take Him everywhere with me - I'd talk out loud in the car to Him - laugh and cry, tell Him about my day. It was a warm place. Secure.

But I realize that when we've lost God....it's not God who is lost. He never changes. He stays the same. It's always me. Me, me, me. When I close myself off and block my heart, I'm hurting everyone around me and most importantly, God. I'm working on getting back to the place where we (God and I) used to be. It's a rough road, but I'm trying. Another wake up call. Another point of realization. It never ends.

Contemplation

2005-11-30T11:12:00.000-08:00

"Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, valuable, but small. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of what I read in a book, or saw in a movie, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void."

2005-11-29T12:05:00.000-08:00

Have you seen the new show this season called Related? It's about four sisters - Ginnie, Anne, Margee & Rose - each of them very different from the others. I am really loving it! It's really cute and funny and it makes me happy. Monday nights on the WB. Check it out.

A Place To Call Home

2005-11-28T12:55:00.000-08:00

A little while ago, near the beginning of the month, my church threw a bridal shower for me. It was really great - holy, did we ever get STUFF!! And beautiful stuff too!

This pic is of me (in the middle) and my 2 best friends, and bridesmaids, Lish (left) and Genelle (right) at the shower. Good times!

Warren and I are feeling pretty overwhelmed these days by the support and generosity we've felt from friends and family during this time. It's pretty great.

We can hardly wait to set up our appartment and have a place to call our home... something that excites me beyond words. I've done the roomate-thing....the living-on-my-own-thing....the back-at-home-with-Mom-&-Dad-thing.... and now I'm ready (and anxious) to live with the man I love. PS - Did I mention that I'm crazy about this guy???!?

19 DAYS AND 18 SLEEPS!!!!

Old Love

2005-11-23T09:21:00.000-08:00

Okay Kids, time for reflection.

The other night, I was sitting at the counter, eating supper with my parents. We had been sitting there for a while and it was pretty quiet. Both Mom and Dad were content and peacefully munching on their dinner. Every once in a while they'd look up and meet each other's eyes, following with a smile. Once or twice, dad looked up, as if to look for something (maybe salt & pepper, whatever) and before he even opened his mouth to ask for it to be passed, Mom had nonchelantly handed it to him as he thanked her.

As I quietly finished my plate and looked back and forth from one parent to the other, I realized how amazing this winessed situation really was. After 29 years of marriage, there was this beautiful comfortableness and relationship between the them. Old love.

Sometimes words are necessary, yet sometimes they're not. Sometimes you can love a person so much and know them so well that you can communicate with each other through a look or an expression. That's a gift.

Young people often talk too much. We feel such a need to be heard. We're missing the beauty of silence and the comfortableness of quiet. This comes with age, with experience. I get it. And I'm beginning to realize that this is something that needs to be learned and will grow within time. Young love. We learn by experience. We grow through time.

Warren and I are young. We're new. We are only beginning on this journey they call marriage. I gotta say, having a relationship as close and as wonderful as my parents to watch and learn from is a blessing. Each stage of love, whether it's young or it's old, is a treasure and is something to acknowledge and enjoy at every stage.

I learned a lot at that particular supper, as quiet as it was.

Derailed

2005-11-15T16:43:00.000-08:00

Omigosh!!!! Warren and I saw Derailed on the weekend and I gotta say, I loved it! I usually don't do scary movies, but somehow, I was really into this one. It was that good. Maybe it's because I really like Jennifer Aniston....or because I had Warren by my side to hold hands with....or because I was due for a good scare. Don't really know, but I dug it. I think it was really well made. I also think you should all see it sometime....but not alone.

Thoughts of a VERY Soon-To-Be Bride...

2005-11-10T13:47:00.000-08:00

Busy, busy, busy. My life is just humming right now. Ah, wedding plans. There's a steady flow of to do's on my daily agenda and I love it. But last night, I had a bit of a breakdown because it felt like everybody was tugging at me in every direction. What's a bride to do? Warren, in all of his sensibility and practicality, slowly directed me back to reality and made me realize that everything will work out. It always does. He was right. I needed to chill out. Relax. Breathe. And most of all, enjoy this time of planning, giddyness and pampering. I am. I really am. I know I'll miss these hectic times when it's all said and done. To be honest, I think last night was one of the first times I've felt frazzled at all during these past 8 or so months of planning, which is a blessing.

I'm loving the idea part. It's neat to be able to take every little idea or thought and combine it into one big event, one that celebrates and symbolizes Warren and I. It's been a real opportunity to get creative and personal with all the little details. That's what I love...the details. Our wedding is going to be so pretty, so detailed and personal. Everything from the invitations, to the decorating, the wedding favors, the music, and even the wedding bands!

I'm really missing my big sister these days. Mel's my maitron of honor. Now with my wedding coming up so quickly and all of these plans and details to cover, I ache for her to be here with me to share in it all. She makes everything better. I can't wait to have her home to get all giddy and girlie with me. These are times to remember.

This week Mom and I met with our florist, which was really exciting. I had my shower on Tuesday evening at the church - that was wonderful. Omigosh, did we ever get stuff!! And beautiful stuff too - I can hardly wait to set up our place now. Kinda overwhelming at how blessed we are by the support and generosity of so many people. Tomorrow I have my 2nd dress fitting, which is always magical - can't wait to try it on again. Things are really coming together and picking up speed. 37 days and counting!! All good stuff. But most of all, I just can't wait to be with Warren again this weekend! I kinda miss him.

Girlfriends

2005-11-03T15:49:00.000-08:00

There's nothing better than throwing on your pj's, pulling your hair up into a messy bun, slipping off your socks and on your slippers and gabbing with your girlfriends for the evening. Are ya with me? There's something very wonderful about the bond between girlfriends...it's something that we just plain can't share with anyone else - our guys, our family, our pets. It's a comfort thing.

I feel this with Genelle and Lish - call me cheesy, call me lame - but these two are my kindred spirits, much like Anne and Diana in Anne of Green Gables. C'mon ladies, you know you know what I'm talking about. We've been the three muskateers for as long as I can remember.

Genelle is the spunky one. She's so animated and full of life - she lights up the room. She has these eyes that are so big and brown and captivating - they sparkle and dance when she talks. Genelle has a heart of gold and is very alert and aware of details - she's always ready for a good time, and in the same way, is always ready to drop what she's doing to listen and quietly be a listening ear or the voice of reason. She's an elementry school teacher and is extremely brilliant and great at what she does.

Lish is adventurous. She's a nurse and very much like her profession, she's extremely warm hearted and nurturing towards others. When there's a risk to be taken, she's all over it. When there's an advenure to be had, she's there. Lish is very smart and independent and excels at most everything she does. She's a really good conversationalist and is the go-to girl when there's a problem or a situation to solve. But mostly, I love her heart. It's big and it's there and its' always open.

The three of us have gone through all of life's big and small milestones together. By milestones I mean junior high, summer camp, high school, crushes, parties, driver's training, jobs, moving away from home, moving back home, boyfriends, fiancees, and weddings. The list is endless. We have the kind of friendship where we are all so inependent, living our own lives, yet whenever we get the chance to get together, we always pick up right where we left off. There's that familiarity and home feeling. I love that!

Today I was thinking about them both and it made me feel giddy and girly and altogether grateful for our strong, forever friendship.

Ramblings of a Relaxed Bride

2005-10-26T14:19:00.000-07:00

Wedding plans are in full swing, as you can imagine and things are coming up quickly. As of today, 52 days and counting!!! This is a very good thing!

I've been thrilled by the RSVP's we've been getting back in the mail each day - actually, that's been a big highlight for me each day.

There is much to do - mostly the nitty-gritty details left, which is fun for me. I have genuinely enjoyed the wedding planning process. I haven't really felt stressed or frustrated much at all. I'm definitely not one of those bridezillas you read about it the magazines... It's been a really fun and rewarding experience. Maybe that's because I'm a creative thinker to begin with, so it was like letting a kid loose in a candy store. There are endless posibilities!

But mostly, my mind's been filled with thoughts of what it will be like to actually be married. The wedding is one thing - very fun, romantic, exciting, beautiful, etc. - but in all honesty, it's only a day. Being back together with Warren has really brought that into perspective for me and made me realize how much I anticipate living together and sharing a life together as husband and wife. It goes so much deeper than the wedding. I feel so loved and so blessed to have this amazing gift of love, of Warren in my life. He's everything to me and I guess I just know that this is something pretty sacred, pretty real.

A Clear Revelation

2005-10-24T12:44:00.000-07:00

God's shown me lots of stuff about myself lately that I need to and want to change. This past week - more near the end of it - was a tough one, in some ways. It was tough because no one likes to be slapped in the face with reality. Especially when you're wrong and you know it. The changing process, the time in which God takes your heaped up heart into His hands and moulds you like putty, can be a weary one. But the end result....it's something beautiful. I'm on my way there. I am trying to get back to the place I seem to have distanced myself from.

I tend to be a very selfish person. I guess we all do, that's the humanness in us. But this is different. I want to understand what it means to be a selfless individual because I know how easy it is to slip into a me first mode. That sucks.

When you are around an unselfish person, you know it. You see it and you feel it. Everything in the room feels different - somehow light and airy, easy going and happy. God gives each of us the opportunity each morning to wake up and map out our journey for that day. It's up to us how we will react to each situation and where we will put our focus.

I love when God wakes me up and gives me a clear revelation. I know this will be a forever process for me, something I will be striving to better myself in for the rest of my life. We all have our things, our areas that need work. But I guess today I just come with a full heart and a willingness to change and see myself for who I really am standing infront of such a big God.

A Little 'Bout Me...

2005-10-20T11:37:00.000-07:00

1. name that appears on birth certificate: Cynthia Marie Bartel
2. any siblings? 1 sister, 2 brothers & 1 brother-in-law
3. number of candles on your last birthday: 24
4. pets: 1 dog - Kodak
5. hair color: blonde
6. piercings: ears
7. eye color: light blue
8. hometown: Leamington, ON
9. favorite foods: Tacos (mexican food), cheesy hashbrowns!
10. favorite icecream: It's ALL good!!!!
11. ever been to Africa? nope
12. what's the furthest you've been from home? Haitii.....also Europe (Paris, France and London England) - not sure which one's further...
13. have you ever loved someone so much it made you cry? yes
14. been in a car accident? Uh-uh....phew!
15. favorite day of the week: I don't know...Saturday or Sunday...hello, it's the weekend!
16. favorite restaurant: Applebees is climbin' the charts!
17. favorite flower: tulips, hydraengeas, peonies, orchids, calla lillies - "springish" flowers - they're so cute and happy looking
18. favorite sport to watch: hockey...but let me make myself very clear here....as long as it's live and it's someone I know because in all honesty (sorry to my future Toews family) I don't like watching sports on TV - it's kinda boring...
19. favorite sport to play: Ha ha, that's pretty funny...!
20. favorite drink: diet coke
21. favorite color: greens, browns (neutral colours)
22. hobbies?: design, sketching, photography
23. what do you do most often when you are bored?: sadly, probably watch TV
24. name one place you'd love to visit, anywhere in the world: New York City!
25. at which store would you choose to max out your credit card: Oooohh...there are more than one, my friend. For clothes/shoes/bags - Urban Trade, Jacob, American Eagle & Aldo... For home decor/stuff - Pier One Imports, Home Outfitters... For art/hobby stuff - Michaels (Wow, that was easy, wasn't it?!)
26. e-mail or snail mail?: Well, both are great, but there's something about snail mail that's kinda romantic and old fashioned and nice. It would be wonderful and seem more meaningful to recieve snail mail because there's a lot more thought, work and time that goes into it.
27. bedtime: 11ish
28. would you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert?: introvert
29. how many schools have you attended?: 6
30. favorite TV show? The OC - LOVE it!!!
31. last person you went out to dinner with? Warren
32. ford or chevy? Chevy, I think...
33. what are you listening to right now? Paul Brandt - This Time Around
34. do you enjoy life to the fullest? I try to. I love my life!
35. what are your nicknames? Cyn, Squeaker (only by Dad), Critter (only by Warren)
36. would you ever bungee jump? Do I look like I'm mentally challenged???!?
37. outdoor activity or indoor? Outdoor
38. shoe size: 7
38. who do you miss most? Warren
39. the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? The eyes, for sure.
40. Last movie you watched: Elizabethtown
41. favorite smell: fresh cookies in the oven
42. favorite time of year: Christmas!!!

A Closer Look

2005-10-19T13:49:00.001-07:00

So, I thought I might post a few pics on my space here, because if you're anything like me, you appreciate the visual aspect of most things and agree with the phrase "A picture is worth 1000 words". Here's a look into my little corner of the world...

First thing's first - there he is, in all his glory. Warren, my fiance. Yup, he's cool, he's stylin' and he's got what it takes to make your heart melt. But anyway, in this picture, he's sitting at one of our favorite spots down by the river in Saskatoon (university side). We've shared many good talks and made many memories down there.

We're a pretty easy going couple - it doesn't take much for us to have a good time, which is a good thing because when you're students, the money doesn't exactly flow like milk and honey! One of our favorite things to do is to go for long walks and just talk, laugh and be goofy. We love Saskatoon! What a great city!

Okee-dokee, now it's time to introduce you to the rest of the Bartel clan. Kay, this is my little brother, Jon (21) and his longtime girlfriend, Karen (21). They are one of my all-time favorite couples! They're so nutty and fun. They've literally been dating for almost 6 years now! It's only because they are true high school sweethearts - since like grade 10 or something?! Kar is like my second sister. We've done a long road trip together, vactationed in Florida together and ate many Christmas dinners together. Good times. Jon is an Audio Engineer - went to OIART (Ontario Institute of Audio Recording Technology) and is now an intern there. He's super artistic and an amazing musician. That guy's got stuff! And Kar is at the U of W taking all kinds of sciences - biochem is her baby. Anyway, I think she eventually wants to become a teacher. She'll be great at whatever she does. She's a real go-getter.

And... this is one of my favorite pictures of all time. It's my other brother, Steve (22) and his longtime girlfiend Vicki (21) on the beach. The reason I enjoy it so much is because it totally captivates who these two are. Vick is a nutcase! Seriously, she's so crazy and spunky. Steve is a bit more quiet and serious but still goofy, very goal-oriented. Together, they are such a great couple. I think they've been together for just over two years now. Steve is finishing his last year in Mechanical Engineering at the University of Windsor and Vick is in the Communications program at the same university. They are the living proof that opposites attract! I can't wait to see what the future holds for these two.

This is my big sister and best friend, Mel (27) and her beautiful little girl Mikayla Jade (almost 2) (also known as MJ to our family). These 2 pics are kinda old now, but I think they're pretty great. Just look at those blue eyes!! MJ was born on November 11, 2003, offically making me Auntie Cyndy for the first time. She's a very special girl to me. She brings so much life and laughter to the clan. And what a little stinker...she's got opinions, that girl! LOVE her!

So anyways, that's not all....there's more where that came from, but I'll save that for another day. Hopefully this gives you somewhat of a start to understanding who I am, where I come from and the people who surround me. What a life!

The Glow

2005-10-18T14:17:00.000-07:00

I think I'm glowing. No...I'm positive that I'm glowing. In fact, I really don't think this smile has left my face since the weekend. If I said it was because the sun is shining and the air is a nice, crisp cool, I'd be only partly right. Aw, who am I kidding, it's because I'm just a girl in love. The truth is, my fiance - Warren Toews - has finally, finally come home! Phew. What a long stretch of long-distnace that was!

Okay, okay, let me give you the lowdown before I carry on any more. See, Warren's currently in his last year of the Optometry program at U of W and was gone on his resdency/externship - in Birmingham, Alabama (of all places!) and then he did a shorter stretch in Saskatoon, SK. Aside from a weekend here or there (I think there were 3 times we saw each other in that span), we've been apart for nearly 6 months now - for most of our engagement! Eeek! So you can only imagine how stoked I am to have my man back and be able to spend the remaining 2 months of our engagement together!!! WOW.

So whatever, this past weekend was heaven. We did lots. Friday, he got here later than expected - clinic ran late - and so we just vegged and had a Corner Gas marathon (yup, you read that correctly - Corner Gas is a Warren fav. I think it's a Saskatchewan thing...I don't know) Saturday morning, Lisa Quick from Due South Photography came over to my parents' house to take our engagement pics - it's so pretty in the bush, with all of the fall leaves and stuff. Warren was surprisingly cooperative. Hmmmm... Then, we headed for Windsor and had a BLAST. Just a Warren and Cyn kind of day. We went to the mall for a bit....test drove a car (Warren's idea, of course!)......went out for supper to BP's......and then went to a movie - Elizabethtown - which we both really kinda liked. Sunday morning was church. Then it was off to Matt & Genelle's for lunch. We made pita pizzas, which were quite tasty. It was great catching up with those two. We have fun together. So yeah, what a weekend. Lots of laughing. Lots of good talks. Lots of just loving being back together. I'm happier than a fat kid in a bakery!