Contemplation

"Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, valuable, but small. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of what I read in a book, or saw in a movie, when shouldn't it be the other way around? I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void."

Related

Have you seen the new show this season called Related? It's about four sisters - Ginnie, Anne, Margee & Rose - each of them very different from the others. I am really loving it! It's really cute and funny and it makes me happy. Monday nights on the WB. Check it out.

A Place To Call Home

A little while ago, near the beginning of the month, my church threw a bridal shower for me. It was really great - holy, did we ever get STUFF!! And beautiful stuff too!

This pic is of me (in the middle) and my 2 best friends, and bridesmaids, Lish (left) and Genelle (right) at the shower. Good times!

Warren and I are feeling pretty overwhelmed these days by the support and generosity we've felt from friends and family during this time. It's pretty great.

We can hardly wait to set up our appartment and have a place to call our home... something that excites me beyond words. I've done the roomate-thing....the living-on-my-own-thing....the back-at-home-with-Mom-&-Dad-thing.... and now I'm ready (and anxious) to live with the man I love. PS - Did I mention that I'm crazy about this guy???!?

19 DAYS AND 18 SLEEPS!!!!

Old Love

Okay Kids, time for reflection.

The other night, I was sitting at the counter, eating supper with my parents. We had been sitting there for a while and it was pretty quiet. Both Mom and Dad were content and peacefully munching on their dinner. Every once in a while they'd look up and meet each other's eyes, following with a smile. Once or twice, dad looked up, as if to look for something (maybe salt & pepper, whatever) and before he even opened his mouth to ask for it to be passed, Mom had nonchelantly handed it to him as he thanked her.

As I quietly finished my plate and looked back and forth from one parent to the other, I realized how amazing this winessed situation really was. After 29 years of marriage, there was this beautiful comfortableness and relationship between the them. Old love.

Sometimes words are necessary, yet sometimes they're not. Sometimes you can love a person so much and know them so well that you can communicate with each other through a look or an expression. That's a gift.

Young people often talk too much. We feel such a need to be heard. We're missing the beauty of silence and the comfortableness of quiet. This comes with age, with experience. I get it. And I'm beginning to realize that this is something that needs to be learned and will grow within time. Young love. We learn by experience. We grow through time.

Warren and I are young. We're new. We are only beginning on this journey they call marriage. I gotta say, having a relationship as close and as wonderful as my parents to watch and learn from is a blessing. Each stage of love, whether it's young or it's old, is a treasure and is something to acknowledge and enjoy at every stage.

I learned a lot at that particular supper, as quiet as it was.

Derailed

Omigosh!!!! Warren and I saw Derailed on the weekend and I gotta say, I loved it! I usually don't do scary movies, but somehow, I was really into this one. It was that good. Maybe it's because I really like Jennifer Aniston....or because I had Warren by my side to hold hands with....or because I was due for a good scare. Don't really know, but I dug it. I think it was really well made. I also think you should all see it sometime....but not alone.

Thoughts of a VERY Soon-To-Be Bride...

Busy, busy, busy. My life is just humming right now. Ah, wedding plans. There's a steady flow of to do's on my daily agenda and I love it. But last night, I had a bit of a breakdown because it felt like everybody was tugging at me in every direction. What's a bride to do? Warren, in all of his sensibility and practicality, slowly directed me back to reality and made me realize that everything will work out. It always does. He was right. I needed to chill out. Relax. Breathe. And most of all, enjoy this time of planning, giddyness and pampering. I am. I really am. I know I'll miss these hectic times when it's all said and done. To be honest, I think last night was one of the first times I've felt frazzled at all during these past 8 or so months of planning, which is a blessing.

I'm loving the idea part. It's neat to be able to take every little idea or thought and combine it into one big event, one that celebrates and symbolizes Warren and I. It's been a real opportunity to get creative and personal with all the little details. That's what I love...the details. Our wedding is going to be so pretty, so detailed and personal. Everything from the invitations, to the decorating, the wedding favors, the music, and even the wedding bands!

I'm really missing my big sister these days. Mel's my maitron of honor. Now with my wedding coming up so quickly and all of these plans and details to cover, I ache for her to be here with me to share in it all. She makes everything better. I can't wait to have her home to get all giddy and girlie with me. These are times to remember.

This week Mom and I met with our florist, which was really exciting. I had my shower on Tuesday evening at the church - that was wonderful. Omigosh, did we ever get stuff!! And beautiful stuff too - I can hardly wait to set up our place now. Kinda overwhelming at how blessed we are by the support and generosity of so many people. Tomorrow I have my 2nd dress fitting, which is always magical - can't wait to try it on again. Things are really coming together and picking up speed. 37 days and counting!! All good stuff. But most of all, I just can't wait to be with Warren again this weekend! I kinda miss him.

Girlfriends

There's nothing better than throwing on your pj's, pulling your hair up into a messy bun, slipping off your socks and on your slippers and gabbing with your girlfriends for the evening. Are ya with me? There's something very wonderful about the bond between girlfriends...it's something that we just plain can't share with anyone else - our guys, our family, our pets. It's a comfort thing.

I feel this with Genelle and Lish - call me cheesy, call me lame - but these two are my kindred spirits, much like Anne and Diana in Anne of Green Gables. C'mon ladies, you know you know what I'm talking about. We've been the three muskateers for as long as I can remember.

Genelle is the spunky one. She's so animated and full of life - she lights up the room. She has these eyes that are so big and brown and captivating - they sparkle and dance when she talks. Genelle has a heart of gold and is very alert and aware of details - she's always ready for a good time, and in the same way, is always ready to drop what she's doing to listen and quietly be a listening ear or the voice of reason. She's an elementry school teacher and is extremely brilliant and great at what she does.

Lish is adventurous. She's a nurse and very much like her profession, she's extremely warm hearted and nurturing towards others. When there's a risk to be taken, she's all over it. When there's an advenure to be had, she's there. Lish is very smart and independent and excels at most everything she does. She's a really good conversationalist and is the go-to girl when there's a problem or a situation to solve. But mostly, I love her heart. It's big and it's there and its' always open.

The three of us have gone through all of life's big and small milestones together. By milestones I mean junior high, summer camp, high school, crushes, parties, driver's training, jobs, moving away from home, moving back home, boyfriends, fiancees, and weddings. The list is endless. We have the kind of friendship where we are all so inependent, living our own lives, yet whenever we get the chance to get together, we always pick up right where we left off. There's that familiarity and home feeling. I love that!

Today I was thinking about them both and it made me feel giddy and girly and altogether grateful for our strong, forever friendship.